Friday, October 19, 2007
I couldnt sleep anymore after receving boyfriend's message in the middle of the night. wow? so sweet? NO! we quarrel almost everything under the sky. He's starting to work. And im starting to miss him like hell. Everything is going the wrong side. Nothing i do is correct. All i want is a little caring message from him once in a while. I've been waiting and waiting every minutes and every seconds. I just couldnt concentrate on anything but keep on missing him. My life is ruin. So ruined. I know i have to be prepared once boyfriend start working. I thought it's easy to control as we can always contract with each other no matter when. I thought it's easy to control as we get to meet after work no matter what happens. hahas. I thought, i thought, i thought. you thought i think who confirm.I just dont know what to do now. Just what can i do to stop letting the devil out of me. The devil is slowly crawling out without boyfriend around me. My tempers gets worst every seconds without boyfriend. My life is just so messy without boyfriend. Even for a second. I couldnt think properly without boyfriend.My life is ruin. I wasnt like that before. I wasnt like that before boyfriend fills up my life with full of colours. And now. These colour are fading away fast. There's no way we can meet anymore. He's starting work so donkey early. Ending work at a donkey time. After that damn tired.He's plan for everyday is start and end work at a donkey time and damn tired after work. Going home to rest after work. And my job is to miss him evey single seconds once i open my eyes. To waiting for his little caring message every single seconds. oh please god, please teach me what can i do? what i can i do stop missing him so much. What can i do to stop giving him problems. What can i do to stop the devil inside me from crawling out fast.boyfriend,arbo you tell me what can i do to stop all this. Teach me how?Im lost~
Im Fading away~ Slowly~
3:57 AM
